Venice

The great Borat once said something great about the Italian city of Venice. What he said was intelligent, moving, full of emotion. What he said was "Ve Niiiiice" 

Okay, sorry for the bad joke.

I have such mixed feelings of Venice. Most bits I absolutely loved, but I don't have an urge to go back like I do with some of the other countries and cities I visited.

We arrived in Venice to quote possibly the WEIRDEST hotel I have ever stayed at. And trust me, that is being kind. The place looked like Grandma's House if Grandma was born in the 1800's. Tiles polluted with four leaf clovers were slathered on the walls and floors of the bathroom, it was enough to even give a leprechaun nausea. The TV in the room would be close to being one of the first invented in the world, the beds small, rikkity and so close together me and Court pretty much spooned. The wallpaper like something out of a yet to be renovated house of off The Block NZ - Mark Richardson eat ya heart out.

This was also my first encounter with a butt-washer. Formally known as bidet (Bi-Day - a little french toilet that squirts water up your butt). I definitely did not use it lol.

After we all checked in on each other's rooms to make sure they were all as rank as each other, we headed into Venice to scope the magical, floating city out.

It was nothing less than stunning. Although one thing they forget to tell you is that it stinks. The water in the canals is virtually stagnant. So you can imagine what it was like catching a whiff. It was easy to ignore though, as around every bend of the cobblestone streets you were rewarded with a cute bridge with views each side of the canals that were framed by some of the most beautiful buildings. I was in awe. And then we got to go on the gondolas.

Being on the gondola was a real pinch me moment. I was lucky enough to nab the spot at the front of the gondola so got some sweet solo pics and vids. Very lucky.

We cruised around the canals of Venice for a while, the whole time I thought we were going to crash into the side of a building or nick another boat, but we never did! We did get pretty bloody close though.

After the gondola ride, it was time for a feed. We had been booked in at a beautiful Italian Restaurant and so you could imagine everyone either went for the pizza or the pasta. Or both!

I'm not big into Italian Cuisine. I think it's my hatred of everything tomato apart from tomato sauce. But I still enjoyed my meal. And I don't mind a wee Aeperol Spritz.

That night, a small group of us returned home after heading for gelato after tea. We jumped on the tram back home, which was super packed so we had to split into two groups of four. The tram police were out patrolling that night. And they take their job very seriously. Armed with a handgun even! They asked us to present our tickets, the wee pod of four I was in were asked first. We all had our tickets and were cleared. They wandered up the train, and as we were almost arriving at our stop, they reached the other girls. We pull up at our stop - jump out and after noticing the other girls hadn't exited we quickly ran up to where they were on the carriage and knocked on the door to tell them this was our stop. When we knocked we were met by a very nervous glance from one of the girls, followed by an angry stare from the two tram police.

uh oh.

The tram drove off, leaving half of us standing confused on the platform and the other half probably going to get arrested by these tram police and heading to god knows where.

Shit!

After paying the police an odd amount of Euros, the girls were officially freed and they made it back to our amazing hotel pretty much unscathed. LUCKY!

gelato